His Year of Flops

The Onion's A.V. Club (a non-satirical pop culture site annexed to the satirical pop culture site) has had a running feature this year called "My Year of Flops," in which a writer watches 104 movies (two a week, for the calendrically challenged) that were deemed flops on their releases, and he determines whether the movie was a failure, fiasco or secret success. I can't really tell the difference between failure and fiasco, but I know they're different from secret success.

Anyway, the series ran a good article recently about Albert Brooks' last film, "Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World." I love Albert Brooks, but the reviews were atrocious, so I avoided the film. However, since the writer of the series, Nathan Rabin, pronounced the movie a secret success, I'll have to put it on my queue.

This week's flop is "Basic Instinct 2: Risk Addiction." Of course Rabin considers this movie a failure, but the joy in reading the review is gems like this:

The naughtiness continues as [Sharon] Stone vamps her way through an interview with shrinkologist David Morrissey, a young man with Liam Neeson’s bulky frame and the charisma of beige wallpaper. Stone stalks around Morrissey’s office like a heavily Botoxed panther in the midst of a steep, permanent professional free fall. Morrissey diagnoses Stone as a thrill-seeker with a “risk addiction,” which sounds like the cheesy subtitle for a lame erotic thriller because, well, it is the subtitle for a lame erotic thriller.

Later, Rabin adds this on Morrisey's talent.

Now I don’t want to suggest that Morrissey is not a dynamic performer, but I suspect that the producers could have replaced him halfway through shooting with a handsome mahogany coat rack and nobody would be able to tell the difference.

Find the latest installment of "My Year of Flops" here.